The original paper was a long read to post all of it, but I tried to capture what captured me to re-post;
Everyone, whether they know it or not, whether they care to
know it or not, has a worldview.
And everyone’s worldview is constantly being developed based off
experiences, intentional learning, and just the pure increasing of their
knowledge on life and everything surrounding it. As for me, I threw my worldview out the window. Not literally, but just in the sense
that I don’t like classifying my view on life to a definition. People’s worldviews can’t be constrained
to bullet points and rules. Maybe
when trying to define the views of a group of people, or a country, or a
culture, but when it comes to a personal worldview I don’t feel it is accurate
to say someone has a “this” or “that” worldview. Especially, with our American postmodernism culture, it is
extremely difficult to classify people’s worldview because we are constantly
changing our beliefs from this to that based off whatever makes us feel
good. And yes, that is a worldview
in itself. A worldview is a never
ending cycle. A life long journey
of how a person develops the way they see life.
As
for me, my “worldview” began forming, of course, when I was born. Little did I know at the time but mommy
and daddy were, and still are, huge contributing sources to how I see
life. I was extremely blessed to
be born into a loving, Christian family.
I seriously thank God for my parents, and I don’t say that lightly. My brother, James (younger by three
years), and I were born to a married couple, but our earliest childhood
memories are of life with a split family.
Our parents got divorced when we were pretty young. I was around 5 and James around 2. Thinking back to those early years I
was so confused. I remember crying
myself to sleep because I knew we now lived with Mom, and Dad lived in an
apartment by himself. But I just
didn’t get it. I didn’t understand
because at every soccer game (James and I have played for what feels like our
entire lives) and every karate tournament (I did that for a while too) Mom and
Dad seemed happy together. At
every birthday party, every school open house or carnival, at any public
gathering my parents never argued or showed any resentment or dislike toward
each other. At least, not in front
of my brother or me. This is
probably the first major event that forced me to actually think about life, to
question things, to ask the “whys.”
And I am still continuing to learn from this today as I gain more
knowledge about the past in regards to my parent’s divorce and how they chose
to handle it by putting my brother and me first. Again, I thank God for my parents. When friends become aware that my parents are divorced,
especially those whose parents are still together, I can tell that their next
question is one of, “How did you handle that? Was it hard?”
And every time I answer with this, “If I could rank the severity of
divorces I would rank mine as perfect.
It is the best divorce a kid could dream of.” (Not that a kid should or want to think of their parents
divorcing, but speaking hypothetically).
.......
So
if I’m giving credit where credit is due I dare not leave out the most
influential person in my life, next to my Mom, Dad, and brother. His name is Danny Bowers. It’s crazy to say that I’ve known Danny
for over half of my life. He is
like my big brother. Actually, he
is. Not by blood, but in
spirit. Danny has seen me grow
from a scrawny little eleven year old who wants to do nothing but play soccer
all day, to a stronger (but still scrawny) twenty-three year old man. Or at least I like to think I’m a
man. I do grow facial hair if that
matters. Regardless, in those
twelve years of friendship Danny has had a beyond impactful role in my
life. When we first met I was
fresh out of sixth grade and Danny was fresh out of college with his wife,
Kim. I was the first generation of
youth growing up in the church I attended with my mom and brother, and Danny
was about to be the new youth pastor.
Up to this point in my life I didn’t have a Christian influence outside
my family, but that was definitely about to change. As he joined the pastoral team he hit it off with some, and
Danny being Danny, butted heads with others. Danny has a raw, radical, barbaric like way of following
Jesus and he does his best not limit Christ and put him in a feel good
box. This type of living and
teaching certainly got to some of the more conservative Christians in the
church. As for me this certainly
sparked my attention and caused my ears to perk like a dog who just heard a
whistle. At the beginning though
it took me a while to come around.
Soccer was still number one on my priority list so after training close
to every night and traveling every weekend for matches, church on Sundays and going
to youth group was last on the “to-do” list. And when I did go I wasn’t looking forward to Danny forcing
me to take a deeper look at how I view God. Eventually, the Holy Spirit began tugging at my heart
through the words spoken by Danny.
I guess I actually liked the guy.
He cared about me and my faith.
He cared about my relationship with God. I wasn’t just a number or a student. I was his friend and he was mine.
Throughout
my junior high and high school years Danny helped me to develop, question, and
challenge the way I saw God, how I saw life, and how I followed God. There were countless times where we
would meet up for lunch, dinner, or coffee and he would just pour into my
life. And trust me, I did my best
to be a sponge and soak up every bit of knowledge I could, and then go home and
question it myself. If there is
one thing I learned from him, it is to question. That is how we grow our faith. It is not a sign of weakness or distrust. It is more a sign of the sincerity of
our faith. Danny and I are still
extremely close and his influence in my life is still as great as ever. In fact, he asked me to help lead a
group of his high school students on a short term mission’s trip to Uganda this
summer. I am ecstatic for this
trip. I know the impact it will
have on us all. It will be another
focal point in the continuous growth of my worldview (or shall I just say
faith). Just like when I went to
Indonesia.
I
had the privilege of going to Indonesia in the summer of 2010 for a short term
mission’s trip. This really caused
me to reassess my life and how I lived it. Traveling to a third world country to live with locals, to
sleep on the floor of a wooden hut with a family who lives off less than two US
dollars a day, and who is trapped by the religion of Islam, was quite humbling
to say the least. I came back to
America with so much enthusiasm to change my life and how I lived it, but
unfortunately I was met with resistance.
It didn’t stop me, but it definitely slowed the process.
Next
came the most recent event in the shaping of my worldview. In a sense it is a continuation of my
parents’ divorce, but now they are both about to be remarried and the weddings
are going to be less than four months apart. So many questions were raised. Is this biblical?
Hard to say, but God’s grace is more than sufficient. Who are their soon to be new
spouses? Turns out they’re great
people. Who are their kids? They’re great too. But the real question that was haunting
my brother and I was why did Mom and Dad ever split in the first place? It was kind of an unspoken feeling and
question between James and I our entire lives. We never wanted to ask it. Partly because we were afraid of the
answer and how it had the potential to complicate all of our lives. After all it was the perfect divorce,
remember? Well, with the both of
them getting close to remarrying the question was brought to the surface. I don’t feel comfortable or at liberty
to share the answer since it is a personal family matter, but let’s just say
that the answer didn’t shatter or break my heart. Instead, it healed some more cracks and my respect for my
parents and how they follow God transformed me.
The
way we see life is constantly shaping and shifting. Growing from moment to moment. Instance to instance.
It is hard for me to write this paper and tell you what my worldview is
because honestly, as I sit here looking back on these past events to write this
paper, my view and knowledge of God and life is growing at this very
moment. What I can tell you though
is that I live life completely sold out for God. The Christian God.
The God of the Bible. Of
Adam and Eve. Of Abraham and
Moses. My God. Your God. Our God. I
guess that means I have a Christian worldview?
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