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Who I amReside in St. Louis Missouri currently, Lived in California & Colorado.Husband.Father.Pastor.Football Enthusiast.Teacher.Learner.Dreamer.Reader.Friend. [thoughts & comments blogged here are my reflections living life trusting Jesus as God]

Friday, January 27, 2012

Fear or Afraid

FEAR: an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat

AFRAID: worried that something undesirable will occur or be done

I believe there is a difference between these two words that cause life altering decisions and I feel they need addressed.

Fear can cripple you from acting.  Being Afraid is just emotion you need to get over.  You may disagree or differ with my assessment, which I am ok with, but here is my perspective on this discussion.

Think of what people fear.  Spiders, snakes, death, clowns and for some people the color yellow.  Fears genuinely can freeze people, cause increased blood pressure that forces their body to shut down.  Fears are what keeps us from skydiving or open-cage shark swimming.

Being afraid means that you are worried of an outcome yet you aren't paralyzed to the point where you won't act.  Being afraid means you worry about the Missions trip experience, but you still choose to go.  Being afraid is similar to signing the dotted line on buying a house, not knowing if the market will turn around.  Being afraid means you take a new job, not knowing if it'll last 6 months.
You can still act, live & survive while being afraid.

Too many people, especially leaders, mask FEAR as "just" being AFRAID.  They don't make hard decisions about the company, employees, direction or vision because they are paralyzed by the unknown outcome.  They forget how to risk & be ok failing.  So instead they don't act, let things just be and nothing great is ever pursued.  They freeze and cripple themselves with not acting or making a choice.

Too many husbands shipwreck their marriage on the reef of stubbornness cause FEAR keeps them from being vulnerable & honest with their spouse.  FEAR keeps them from a serving heart & leads with a captains authority.  It's ok for husbands to admit being AFRAID of their spouses response or action but still risk for Her.  They hide inside their cave of manhood only to live there alone.

Too many parents let FEAR guide their parenting & by doing so don't decide to raise adults but nurture infants that can look like teenagers.  Parents need to allow themselves permission to be afraid of making the wrong choice, but still act with proper intentions and desires to raise their children to become adults.  Parents assume they are doing the right thing when really it is just the passive thing to not stand as the parent.

Don't get me wrong there is plenty I FEAR, but I've learned to live with allowing myself to be ok with AFRAID.  I'd rather risk & fail then be passive.  I'd rather choose then pass on a decision.  I'd rather fail 100 times & succeed 1 time all for the sake of trying to live life in such a way that I'm trying to make something more with what God has given me than to just live in neutral.

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