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Who I amReside in St. Louis Missouri currently, Lived in California & Colorado.Husband.Father.Pastor.Football Enthusiast.Teacher.Learner.Dreamer.Reader.Friend. [thoughts & comments blogged here are my reflections living life trusting Jesus as God]

Friday, October 22, 2010

The WHO of me

The WHO of me is something that i've been contemplating since May because it seems that the WHO of me, gets confused with the WHAT of me.

Here is how i have been seeing my life;

I KNOW this about me;
I am a man, husband, father, disciple of Jesus & Child of God, love of sports, selfish, prideful, have struggled with sexual purity, love my family, enjoy learning new things, have a brash personality at times, love studying scripture, love adventure, love-LOVE traveling, enjoying seeing people live with smiles and yes there is more so this isn't a conclusive list.

I also know WHAT i do;
Everything I do is conditional with the context I live in or is asked of me.

So often what I do seems to overshadow who I am. My identity, my core being, what makes my heart & soul come alive CANNOT be conditional on what I do, but who I am.

If this has already confused you then please read on--

Too often people identify who they are by what they do. The actions they make, the words they say, the task list they complete, the books they read, the people they rub shoulders with, the places they visit, the money they make per month, etc etc. What I do each day of my life cannot define who I am. I've never been the person who has wanted WHAT I DO to define me. I hope that never changes.

If all of that defines us....What happens when it is all take away??

If you are quick then you've already in your head said something along the lines of "Danny your list of WHO ARE YOU doesn't match up with that logic!?"

And I would agree with you, except one. The WHO OF ME as a disciple of Jesus & child of God is the only absolute that will always define me. It will always define me cause God has always been & will always be. My relationship with Christ is the only thing that can define me cause it is the only thing that allows my life, soul, my very being to embrace authenticity.
Everything else I do or experience, must be affected by this one thing.

Brennan Manning in his book WISDOM OF TENDERNESS says this "To live a life ignoring the tenderness of God's mercy in you, it will never be able to flow through you in EVERY SETTING it should"

WHAT I DO defines me to other people. It can NEVER define me to myself. However if WHO I AM is a child of God, loved & adorned by the Creator who desires me to live a life that reflects what love, peace, mercy & grace is all about then I MUST live in such a way that WHAT I DO matches up WHO I AM.

Here is how this has been playing out practically;

  • As a husband do I love my wife the way Jesus ask me to?
  • As a father do I lead, mentor & train up my sons so they see a glimpse of God in me & through me?
  • As a friend do I love & care authentically?
  • When I have a choice to live with integrity or impurity what do I chose?
  • Does my language & attitude reflect conviction for God's directing or selfish intentions?

To you (if you are still reading) this may be confusing....and even to me as this has truly been on the forefront of my mind since before the summer I still am trying to get my arms & thinking around this. All I can say is that the conviction has been deep inside of me.

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